Scene: A cast party. The sounds of laughter and glasses clinking in the background. Chorus Member sits next to a pool filled with floating candles shaped like Camellias. Sexy Italian Director approaches and sits next to her.
Sexy Italian Director: Chorus Member. You are so fun to watch on the stage. You are so good at the acting.
Chorus Member: Grazie.
Sexy Italian Director: And your kissing of the other girl. It is very sexy.
Chorus Member: Umm... thank you.
Sexy Italian Director looks Chorus Member intensely in the eyes, and leans in for a kiss. Chorus Member stops him.
Chorus Member: This is not a good idea.
Sexy Italian Director: Why not? Two beautiful people? What could be more, how do you say, natural?
Chorus Member: I'm married.
Sexy Italian Director: He does not have to know.
Chorus Member: I would know.
Sexy Italian Director: I see.
Pause. Sexy Italian Director backs off, but then grabs Chorus Member passionately.
Sexy Italian Director: Run away with me.
Chorus Member: What?
Sexy Italian Director: I will buy you a ticket to come back with me to Milan.
Chorus Member is stunned into silence.
Sexy Italian Director: We can live together. You do not need to pack. I will take you shopping when we arrive. I will sing to you Italian love songs, and you will say to me the Shakespeare. We will make love all day and all night.
Chorus Member's jaw hangs open like a dead fish.
Sexy Italian Director: Say yes.
Chorus Member: No.
Sexy Italian Director: No? Why no?
Chorus Member: I'm married. I'm a mother. I have floors to wash and laundry to do and bills to pay and dinners to cook and noses to wipe and toys to trip over and....
Her voice trails off.
Chorus Member: When can we leave?
Sexy Italian Director grabs Chorus Member and they kiss. Lights fade to black.
****************
This in no way represents any cast party I have actually attended this weekend. Nor does it represent any actual conversation had between any theoretical chorus member or director of an opera (except as already stated). Nor does it in any way indicate that said chorus member would leave her husband and child for a life of luxurious Italian living. No, it is simply a Monday Mission post. If you wish to play along write your own post as script/dialogue and come back here and leave a link to your post in the widget below.
And pray that today is not the day my husband decides to start reading my blog. Hi honey! Or that anyone in my show finds this blog. Particularly the director.
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23 comments:
I was wodering if you're husband read the blog...
Loooove it! Too funny!
Heidi
Ha ha ha...I detected a bit of Masimo the Italian Stallion in the "sexy Italian director"... ;)
Mine is posted...not as funny as yours, but still fun.
This was very funny, PM. And I can't wait to hear about your opening night!
LOL...very good. Oh yes, that a life, so easy to say no to that! LOL
I did done! I steered away from funny, although there is plenty of that to choose from. I tried to combine two missions. Let's hope it was successful and I didn't mistake inches for centimeters. ;)
Julie
Using My Words
Milan does sound awfully nice...
That was really cute. I like the idea of not packing, but just going shopping for all new things once you get there.
HA HA HA! Very funny.
How did opening night go?
Hmmmm?
Milan or dirty dishes?
Hard choice. :)
Hee hee. What a riot!
That's pretty funny!
Oh this is great!
Send Mr. Sexy Italian Director over this way...
Only something tells me there'd be more dishes and laundry in Milan. Eventually.
You're so good at this.
Aaaack! And I really wanted to do this one. I keep forgetting to do these, now that I'm not hosting.
But I loved this little one-act of yours!
"say yes."
What's that? I couldn't hear you over my vacuum cleaner.
That's what would happen to me.
Love it. Is there anything sexier than an Italian accent?
i was SOSOSOSO believing this really happened until he very end! great mm.
You totally had me going. I was scandalized. But I like the happy ending of your reality.
Love this. Thanks for the laugh at the end of a cranky Monday.
On another note I'm hoping opening night went off smashingly.
A new wardrobe in a villa?
Are you blogging from Italy?
Very funny!
But the real question - how did opening night go? Did the soprano recover in time? Did the BIG KISS go okay? Details!
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