Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Under Cover

There are things, of course, that can't always be written on a public blog... even an anonymous one. Things that maybe, in time, will be brought to light.

So think of me as working busily under cover. Researching, watching, working, formulating. This under cover job takes up much of my time and much of my brain power, not to mention much of my emotional capital, leaving me at a loss for things to share.

I'm not taking a break from blogging, but I'm finding that I have less time and less interest in it at the moment. I'm not writing as much. I'm not reading as much.

I'm hiding in the shadows.

Sunday, January 24, 2010

How to Keep the Drama Onstage

An Instruction Manual by Monday Mission Press

All good actors should do their best to keep the dramatics limited to the stage, and away from the dressing and green rooms.

1. The best way to keep the drama on the stage is to refrain from having a "showmance." This is easiest if you already have a relationship with someone outside of the production.

2. If you DO manage to get romantically entangled with another cast mate, limit your public displays of affection (PDAs) to the bar after the show. Under no circumstance should you disappear with a cast mate behind closed doors and reappear, straightening your hair/and or clothes. Also, please be sensitive to the fact that there were probably other single folks in the cast lusting after your recent conquest. Flaunting your inability to keep your hands off of each other makes them mopey and unpleasant, further worsening the experience for everyone forced to stand in the wings together.

3. Never act like you know everything about every topic, even if you are sure you do.

4. Stop complaining about the bad tasting water, and bring your own from home.

5. Keep conversations backstage quiet, or else the audience can hear you! Also... if you've said it once and no one responded, it's likely because they didn't care. There is no need to repeat it louder. Let it go.

6. Acknowledge that not everyone has to be best friends.

7. It is not a good idea to share all the details of your latest fantasy/night with your boyfriend/most recent drinking binge.

8. Don't take everything so personally.

9. No stalking!

10. Don't continually disparage yourself, or everyone else will be forced to agree with you.

11. Apologize when you make a mistake, and praise others when they do well.

12. Leave the outside world OUTSIDE.

This post has been a Monday Mission. This week's mission, should you choose to accept it, is to write a post in the style of an instruction manual. If you play along please post a link to your instructions in the widget below:

Next week begins a new month, but I am going to take some time off from the missions. I'm not sure if it will last a full month or not. I'll keep you posted. Many thanks to those of you who have been playing along, and they will return, I promise. In the meantime, if you have any ideas for a Monday Mission (what style could we write posts in?) let me know. Maybe your ideas are just what I need to inspire me!

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Multiple Personality Disorder: Theatre Thursday (a day late)

To distract you from the near lack of content around here lately, I will share some pictures from one of the Fringe Fest shows I did in November. I tried to get these up yesterday for a Theatre Thursday, but my computer would freeze up every time I tried to upload the photos. That made for a jolly day.

Anyhow... I played a lot of different parts. Here we go...I danced through the whole monologue. If I could have danced to Prince, this would have been heavenly. As it was, I danced to the Pixies, who are just fine, but not exactly the type of music that pulls me onto the dance floor. So I had to pretend like I was completely confident and totally into it. And talk at the same time. I felt like a real jerk, but think I finally managed to pull it off.

I got to keep those leggings.
Maybe I'll wear them to church this weekend.
I work undercover for the government.
(I also got to keep the hat and coat. Have any spy work you want to hire me for? I've got the outfit!)

A modern Romeo and Juliet. Or an elderly K Fed and Brittany?

Driving my imaginary Mini Cooper. Which apparently has a teeny tiny steering wheel. Romeo's car apparently has a REALLY TALL gas pedal.

Sunday, January 17, 2010

Today's Top Headlines: Monday Mission

Painted Maypole would have been better in the lead role
Director confesses that casting choices were political; Painted Maypole declines to comment

Single Parenting Sucks
Mom and daughter missing "Daddy" after a two week absence

No Rhyme or Reason to Roofers
4 estimates vary by a span of $5000

Looking for a Muse in all the wrong places
Blogger finds herself at a loss for words

Desk Discovered
While cleaning her home, woman exclaims "there really is a desk under here!"

Southern Arctic Freeze Finally Thaws
Locals once again venture outside without socks

Bed Sheet Pants
Our costume designer works stage magic with a bed sheet and some elastic.
(We make no claims on the attractiveness of the pants)

This post has been a Monday Mission. This week's mission, should you choose to accept it, is to write a post in the style "Today's Headlines" (inspired by this Cold Spaghetti post). Please submit your top headlines to the editor by placing a link in the widget below:

And join us next week, when your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to write a post in the style of an instruction manual.

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Another Postcard

Hey, Big Guy!
Remember when I sent you all those Chimpanzee postcards?
I miss you.
Painted Maypole

This post has been a Monday Mission. This week's mission, should you choose to accept it, is to write a post in the style of a postcard. If you play along, send your postcard via Mr. Linky Post (aka, put a link in the widget below)

And join us next week, when your mission is to write a post in the style of "Today's Headlines" (inspired by this Cold Spaghetti post)

Friday, January 8, 2010

Otherwise engaged

I'm filling up my days with a variety of projects around the house, and my daughter is filling up my days with two days off of school (one for illness, one for weather) and my director is filling up my days with rehearsals... Posts percolate as I work and some have even been started but none have quite made it here. But I'll see you for sure on Monday with a Monday Mission in the style of a postcard (I did a postcard post last year that I'm rather fond of), if inspiration doesn't hit before then.

Now, back to my projects...

Sunday, January 3, 2010

Year End Self Evaluation: Monday Mission

Name: Painted Maypole
Department: around the Maypole
Title: Thespian Mommy
Date: 1/3/09

1. How well did you fulfill your duties as a Thespian Mommy?

I acted the role of Mommy quite well. I even sang and danced. It was Painted Maypole, the musical! starring Painted Maypole as the lovable, somewhat scattered but quite endearing mother of the May Queen, (the real star of the show). I kept my child alive and thriving (thus fulfilling my mommy duties) and performed in 7 different productions (thus more than fulfilling my thespian duties).

2. How well did you work with others?

Well, I snapped a bit at The May Queen, but that's all part of the mommy job description, right? I was nice to all my castmates, even the untalented buttheads. My husband and I never fought and we were the picture of marital harmony and parental agreement. In short, I was nearly perfect.

3. Did your work reflect the mission of the company?

Hmm... I'm not sure what our mission is, but up there at the top it says "come dance 'round the Maypole with me." So is our mission dancing? I did some of that. I have tried to live with joy and grace, and get back up and keep dancing, even after I've fallen. Some times it just takes a little longer to get back into the rhythm.

4. Did you grow (in skills, abilities, behaviors, knowledge, etc.)?

Physically, I shrank. Oh, skills, etc. Hmm... well, I have definitely expanded my experience and confidence in the singing and dancing department. I have stretched my comfort level and learned new things on stage. Growth in the Mommy arena is less measurable. One area I would like to grow this coming year is in providing more consistent expectations and discipline.

This post has been a Monday Mission. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to write a performance review (inspired by Heather at In Te Domine's clever Year End Self Evaluation (hint: feel free to steal her format. She's given us permission!) My questions were adapted from the 4 questions at this site. And you don't have to do a self-evaluation. You could review the performance of something else. How did your toaster perform this year?

Please turn in your review to our supervisor by posting a link in the widget below:

And join us next Monday, when our mission is to write a post in the style of a postcard

Saturday, January 2, 2010

my 2009

I did this last year, and decided to do it again.

1. What did you do in 2009 that you’d never done before?
Taught a drama class with my daughter in it.
Was thrown over someone else's head on stage. In front of a live audience. And we all lived to tell about it.
Lost 20 pounds without giving birth to another being.
Adopted a kitten.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I made no resolutions last January, although this summer I decided to buckle down and stop whining (to myself, I never really did it outloud much) about my weight and lose some... and I lost over 20 pounds. I'm immensely proud of myself. I've also managed to stay at this weight through the holidays, which is no small feat (she says, as she takes another swig of mimosa...) Now that I've lost the weight I'd really like to exercise more to tone up... but I dare not think of that as a new year's resolution or it will never happen.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Oh yes. My best friend from college gave birth to twins, and a dear friend from days in LA gave birth, after many years of hoping and praying and medical help, to a beautiful baby boy, for whom I will be a godmother.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Not in 2009, knock on wood.

5. Where did you travel?
Cabo. Michigan. The mountains of Tennessee and North Carolina. Orlando for Disney.

6. What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?
More organization and less clutter. (oh my, even I can't help laughing at that one...)

7. What dates from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
January 21st. The inauguration. This year has not been all I'd hoped it would be, and President Obama has not done everything that I had hoped he would, and yet I still believe that we are heading in a better direction than we were, and that we would be if a different president were in office.
There are moments, too, that don't need a specific date, but that are dear to me. Like the sound of my daughter's laughter the first time she saw me on stage.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Losing over 20 pounds. Yippee!

9. What was your biggest failure?
Oy. I am going to keep this one to myself.

10. What was the best thing you bought?
I have to agree with Aunt Becky, and say my iPhone. How did I live before I could check my e-mail from ANYWHERE, and answer just about any question with a visit to google? That Lose It! app came in pretty handy, too. I also have this fabulous scarf that I get complimented on every time I wear it. Oh. And skinny jeans. Because I CAN.

11. What song will always remind you of 2009?
I'm going to have to go with Single Ladies by Beyonce. From the cast of Beast learning the moves backstage to my terrible rendition at a Mardi Gras parade to the football team on glee dancing on the field, Single Ladies seemed to keep reappearing in 2009. 10 years from now when I hear the song I will think of these things, and this year.

12. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Scrapbooking. I'm now over a year behind.

13. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Snapping at my child.

14. What was your favorite TV program?
glee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (I love it. Can you tell? oh please, please, please don't cancel this show!)

15. What was your favorite movie?
probably Julie and Julia

16. What was the best book you read?
I really should keep a list of what I read, because I can never seem to think of what I've read, let alone what was the best. Maybe The Bean Trees by Barbara Kingsolver.

17. What one thing would have made your year measurably more satisfying?
The answer I gave last year still holds true, unfortunately: Close friends nearby. I have lots of friendly acquaintances, but not a close friend nearby, and I really feel that hole. I keep wanting to cultivate it, but it just never seems to happen.

18. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?
Concept? How about... trying not to look too old but at the same time trying not to look like I'm trying to look like a teenager.

19. What kept you sane?
Diet Cherry Coke.

20. Who did you miss?
Again last year's answer: Way too long of a list... I have too many friends and family that are scattered about.

21. Who was the best new person you met?
It's so hard to answer this one, since I meet so many great people working on shows. If I have to whittle it down, I might go with my director for Proof. He was a wonderful director, one of the best I've worked with, which was such a pleasant surprise at this small suburban theatre. He has continued to be very supportive of my work, and I hope to have the chance to work with him again.

22. Tell us a valuable lesson you learned in 2009.
I can turn down offered parts, and other stuff will still come along. (The jury is still out on whether that theatre will ever cast me again or not, though)

Your Monday Mission, should you choose to accept it, is to write a post in the style of a performance review (inspired by Heather at In Te Domine's clever Year End Self Evaluation (hint: feel free to steal her format. She's given us permission!). See you then!