Sunday, June 22, 2008

Empty Nest

This teaching drama thing is kicking my butt. I went to bed last night at 8:30. 8:30!! The May Queen kept getting up with her litany of excuses, and rather than my usual "leave me alone so I can get stuff done" eye rolling I was kicking her out of my bedroom so that I could sleep! Insane.

Tonight there was no litany, however. Tonight she is sleeping over at the neighbor's house. This is not the first time she has slept away, but the house is always oddly empty when she is gone. The door is open to the Jack and Jill bathroom that separates the computer room from her bedroom. The door to her room stands ajar. Her sheets are tangled, but there are no long, tanned limbs jutting out from them in all directions. Her pillow is missing, too.

Tomorrow I will not wake up with a small child's elbow in my back. Or her entire sleeping body on top of mine. (It has happened. Just last week. Maybe that's part of why I'm so tired.)

I know she's fine. And so are we.

But the house just doesn't feel right when she's gone.

13 comments:

flutter said...

they make you miss them, don't they?

JCK said...

Oh, she's such a big girl. I hope you get to sleep in!

I think you, Flutter and I are the only ones awake right now...

the dragonfly said...

I can't even imagine. The only time I've been without the Little Mister overnight was when I was in the hospital last winter. And, with all the painkillers, those memories are a little hazy...

Hope you got some good sleep!

Kyla said...

BubTar sleeps away pretty regularly, but I still always miss him when he's gone.

jen said...

i remember distinctly the moment when M being gone was more striking than her being here...and then we've never looked back.

Rima said...

I know that feeling! It always makes me uneasy, too.

Jen of A2eatwrite said...

C's been gone for a week, as of today. I pick him up Friday. He's at a place that he absolutely loves and I never worry when he's there, but that empty feeling is still there even though he's 15! I can't imagine what it will be like when he moves away.

imbeingheldhostage said...

Oh, I know that empty feeling. It's great to sleep uninterrupted, but there's that empty room...
When Son #1 moved out, I completely gutted his room and moved two of the younger kids into it. I had to, otherwise I would've crawled into his bed and rotted there.

womaninawindow said...

So true, isn't it, just that extra emptiniess that is felt.

Beck said...

Whenever my kids are gone overnight, I always wake up in the middle of the night with this desperate "MY BABY!" feeling. Yeah, I'm going to do great when they go off to university.

MamaGeek said...

Oh so true. Even when mine is only outdoors, the absent noise is so obvious. Enjoy that sleep while you can PM. ;)

Kathryn said...

Aww. I'm not looking forward to those kinds of nights.

Sober Briquette said...

Yes, their absence creates a big huge hole. Even with another child around keeping me busy, on those occasions that Fiona has been on a sleepover, it feels so strange. That door open at night...

However, it's a rare treat to have the chance to sleep in in your own bed. Enjoy.